In a new interview with CBS, Meghan Markle opened up about having suicidal thoughts as part of her healing journey.
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex speaking to Oprah in 2021
On Sunday, CBS aired a rare joint interview with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle about their new Parents’ Network program, and their goal to make the online world a safe space for kids. Launched through the couple’s non-profit Archewell Foundation, The Parents’ Network will seek to deal with the children impacted by traumas through social media use, by providing support to their parents. After a two-year pilot program, the network has been launched in the US, UK, and Canada.
The conversation with Sunday Morning‘s Jane Pauley led to Meghan talking about her own struggles with suicidal thoughts, which the world first got to know in the couple’s 2021 chat with Oprah. “I was really ashamed to say it at the time and ashamed to have to admit it to Harry especially because I know how much loss he has suffered. But I knew that if I didn’t say it, then I would do it,” the Duchess of Sussex said. “I just didn’t want to be alive anymore. That was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought. And I remember how he [Harry] just cradled me.” She continued: “I went to the institution, and I said that I needed to go somewhere to get help. I said that I’ve never felt this way before and I need to go somewhere. And I was told that I couldn’t, that it wouldn’t be good for the institution.”
Three years later, the mother-of-two feels she hasn’t “really scraped the surface” on her experience, and wants to continue being honest about her mental health in hopes of helping others. When the interviewer brought up the topic of Meghan’s suicidal thoughts, she responded by saying that while she “wasn’t expecting” Pauley to touch upon the experience, she still “understood why”. Meghan went on to say, “When you’ve been through any level of pain or trauma, I believe part of our healing journey, certainly part of mine, is being able to be really open about it.” She added, “And I haven’t really scraped the surface on my experience. But I do think that I would never want someone else to feel that way. I would never want someone else to be making those sorts of plans, and I would never want someone else to not be believed. If me voicing what I have overcome will save someone or encourage someone in their life to really, genuinely check in on them and not assume that the appearance is good so everything is OK, then that’s worth it. I’ll take a hit for that.”
Prince Harry also reflected on the time in the 2022 Netflix documentary Meghan & Harry, saying that he is regretful of how he dealt with the situation. “I knew that she was struggling. We were both struggling, but I never thought that it would get to that stage. And the fact that it got to that stage, I felt angry and ashamed. I didn’t deal with it particularly well,” the Duke of Sussex said. “I dealt with it as ‘institutional Harry’ as opposed to ‘husband Harry’. And what took over my feelings was my royal role.” He continued: “Looking back on it now, I hate myself for it. What she needed from me was so much more than I was able to give.”
The couple is set to embark on an official trip to Columbia at the invitation of the country’s Vice President Francia Márquez, where the two will engage with leaders, youth, and women” and “experience the rich heritage of Colombia.”
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