Vogue Arabia, June 2019. Photo: Ulrich Knoblauch
Whether it is with a work acquaintance or the love of your life, boundaries are needed in every relationship to retain your sense of personal identity. The lack of healthy boundaries could be a sign that you are ignoring your own needs or over-committing to make someone else happy, thereby setting yourself up for disappointment later in the relationship. If you are looking to clearly define what you need from a relationship, it helps to look to the infinite wisdom of the cosmos to understand the ways in which your behavioural traits are influenced by the planetary motions and how these can be leveraged to maintain healthy boundaries in your love life:
Aries
Ruled by the planet of action and motivation, Mercury, your inner fire breathes passion into all that you do. However, if you don’t want the flame to fizzle out, it’s necessary to sit down and figure out where you want your boundaries to stand at an early stage in the relationship to avoid feeling suffocated later.
Taurus
As an earth sign, you are more grounded and have a practical approach to love. However, if you haven’t invested time in developing your sense of self-esteem, you could end up looking to your partner to reaffirm your self-worth. To avoid leaving the door open for co-dependence, find ways to love yourself before you love someone else.
Gemini
Your inner sense of spontaneity means that you love it when your other half surprises you with a new date spot or breakfast in bed, but if the relationship feels like it is being dragged down by pressure, you might find your mind wandering elsewhere. If you want to be in it for the long haul, it helps to have a clear conversation with your partner about which boundaries you deem fair and which ones can’t be overstepped.
Cancer
As one of the most emotionally attuned signs in the zodiac sphere, you believe in grand gestures and displays of love. However, your all-in approach to love can mean that those lines start to blur as you place someone else happiness over your own. If you are looking to stand up for yourself in a relationship, you will have to get used to saying no when needed.
Leo
The world is a magical place when a Leo falls in love, but your tendency to place people on a pedestal means that you might find yourself getting disappointed when they don’t live up to the standard you have set for them. It is essential to take the time to see your partner as an individual of their own beyond the relationship, and vice versa, so that both of you can flourish together in all aspects of life.
Virgo
Actions speak louder than words for this earth sign, and given your connection with the planet of communication Mercury, it isn’t hard for you to verbalize the boundaries that you want to set in the relationship. You might, however, want to hear your partner’s requirements as well to ensure that their emotional needs are being met in the relationship too.
Libra
Somebody who can match your pace emotionally and intellectually is your cup of tea, but the people-pleaser in you might end up over-committing to a partner, especially during the initial heady rush of a new relationship. The easiest check before saying yes to something—whether it is meeting the parents or trying something new in bed—is to pause and deliberate if this is a boundary that you can commit to in the long run as well.
Scorpio
Emotional intimacy is of utmost priority to you and while you don’t let people in easily, you have a tendency to go all-in once they have earned your trust—even if this means sometimes overstepping boundaries. If you are looking to allow space for a breather in your relationship, you will want to respect the boundaries that each of you has set while also leaving room for differences of opinion.
Sagittarius
First things first: you aren’t commitment-phobic for wanting some freedom and room for yourself in a relationship. No matter how head-over-heels in love you are with your partner, there is a part of you that will always want to ensure that the relationship doesn’t become your entire identity. Communicating these personal boundaries in a transparent manner will help ensure that you never feel stifled in the relationship.
Capricorn
You thrive on structure, and it comes as little surprise that you have an easier time than most at developing and respecting the boundaries that your partner has set. However, this all-or-nothing approach can also mean that you take time to open up or preemptively walk away from something that doesn’t seem like it will fit within your plan. It helps to remember that people can change, grow and adapt—take a chance and allow love to surprise you!
Aquarius
Ruled by Uranus, rebellion comes easy to you—fitting into the cookie-cutter standards set by society never interested you anyway. This fierce need for independence can mean that you never compromise on your standards, which could perhaps be keeping you from finding true love. Look for somebody you can truly communicate with, so you’ll together find a way to embrace your boundaries while leaving room for growth in the relationship.
Pisces
Your emotional maturity means that you’ll go to any lengths for the ones you love—but when this isn’t reciprocated, you might just let it slide. Being vocal about your boundaries needs to assume top priority to ensure that your relationship isn’t laden with regrets and past resentment.
Originally published in Vogue.in
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